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if memory serves, I am a GEEEEnius

Hardly.

Prosecution Exhibit A: I just received my transcript from graduate school (circa 1992-1993.)

Now, I'm not one to romanticize my grad school experience -- it was fun, but it was rough, mostly for financial reasons, although for academic ones and geographic (Texas) ones as well. I had 3 part time jobs (at once) during undergrad, but in grad school I was 100% supporting myself for the first time. Within 2 months jam-packed with studying, teaching, babysitting, bartending and desperation, I had to call my dad and ask for help with my car payment. Also, against advice, I took 4 courses my first semester and ended up with my lowest G.P.A. ever -- a paltry 3.15. That's *exactly* the kind of performance that blackballs you out of the Rhoads Family Christmas Letter, I can tell you that right now.